(no subject)

[charliesmum]

Probably one of the most annoying things people say when trying to cheer one up is 'things always happen for a reason'. Because, really. How is that helpful? In the long run, yes, it is probably true, but when you're sitting there, sad because your boyfriend dumped you, or you didn't get into the college you wanted to get into or lost a job or whatever, it's not comforting because at that point in time you can't possibly know what that reason is, other than the universe has a twisted sense of humor, or something.

I do believe that things have lessons in them, though. It just sucks that we can't always see that lesson until it is long in the past. Richard Bach, who I've been quoting a lot recently for some reason, once wrote that you are never given a problem without a gift for you in its hands. You have the problem because you need the gift. That occasionally brings comfort to me, even when I couldn't even begin to guess what that gift is. Nonetheless, we all of us have the ability to find that gift - to reach for happiness in the midst of whatever sorrow we find ourselves in. We just have to remind ourselves of that ability once in awhile.

I can't say 'it will get better' because that isn't necessarily true. It will get different. Good things will happen, and even worse things will replace the thing that was previously the worst thing that ever happened. Somewhere in there, though, are the perfect moments. They don't last long, but they are there. The few minutes when you're laughing yourself sick over something a friend said, or you're outside and it's a beautiful day, or you get just for a second, that you're alive, really alive, and that there's always hope. We need to live for the perfect moments. Remembering they are there helps when your in the middle of the not so perfect moments.

Comments

[zambonigirl.livejournal.com]

Too true. The "You're better off without that, something better will come along" just serves to make people pissed off at you and want to throw things.

"Dang, that sucks. Your boss sucks. Let's go TP his house, the wanker." Doesn't help much more, but it's better than any other consolation.

[crossbow1.livejournal.com]

I don't for one second believe that things happen for a reason, and I don't think there are any lessons other than the ones you choose to teach yourself from them.

But you know what's even less helpful? "Just smile!"

[wolfgangmozart.livejournal.com]

Thank you! This is just what I needed to hear today. *hugs*

(Also, Richard Bach is awesome.)

[charliesmum.livejournal.com]

Thank you! This is just what I needed to hear today.

Yay! I helped.

Richard Bach is awesome, although I'm still miffed at him for divorcing Leslie Parrish after writing this whole book about how they are soulmates, making me look way too hard for a soulmate of my own. :)